Drunk Movie Monday, Movies, Reviews

Drunk Movie Monday – Hobbit 3: the Battle of the Five Armies

Before I damage my nerd cred, I feel like I have to say straight-up that the Lord of the Rings trilogy is one of my favorite movies, hands down. In fact I even like the movies better than the books, which is probably because I rather notoriously don't like doorstopper fantasy. But the Hobbit movies?… Continue reading Drunk Movie Monday – Hobbit 3: the Battle of the Five Armies

Books, I Read It First

I Read It First: Paper Towns

And now we come to the book-to-movie adaptation from one half of my inspiration for this series. Oh, John Green. I have such complicated feelings about you as an author. Excellent feelings about you as a human being, but as an author, just...complicated. This is also the only book on this year's movie list that… Continue reading I Read It First: Paper Towns

Drunk Movie Monday, Movies, Reviews

Drunk Movie Monday – They Came Together

You know how Scary Movie and Not Another Teen Movie are only like 50% funny, and the other 50% is just random jokes that completely fall flat and have very little to do with anything? Yeah, well, this is that for rom coms. The film: They Came Together (2014) The premise: It's a meta rom com that's only about half… Continue reading Drunk Movie Monday – They Came Together

Drunk Movie Monday, Movies, Reviews

Drunk Movie Monday – Camp Takota

Can people who got famous because of their own over-the-top personalities be good actors? Maybe, but none of them are in this film. Which is not to say this isn't a thoroughly entertaining movie. Just that if you're expecting fictional characters...you won't find them here. Let's talk about Camp Takota. The film: Camp Takota (2014) The… Continue reading Drunk Movie Monday – Camp Takota

Books, I Read It First

I Read It First: Child 44

For the first time, my initial impressions of a book were wrong! It turns out I don't hate Child 44. Just, like, the first 200 pages of it. And like 50% of the pages thereafter. What I am saying is that this book is way too long. The Book: Child 44 by Tom Rob Smith Genre:… Continue reading I Read It First: Child 44

Books, I Read It First

I Read It First: The Longest Ride

What the hell do people see in Nicholas Sparks that keeps getting his pointless drivel turned into movies? I don't understand. It's not even good romance. He just throws poorly realized trauma-victim stereotypes at one another and mashes their faces together like a toddler playing with barbies. IT'S JUST NOT GOOD. Goddammit. Okay, let's get… Continue reading I Read It First: The Longest Ride

Drunk Movie Monday, Movies, Reviews

Drunk Movie Monday – Cockneys vs. Zombies

This movie, you guys. This. Fucking. Movie. Let me tell you about this delightful bullshit movie. The film: Cockneys vs. Zombies (2012) The premise: Admissions up front: for the average American, the dialogue in this movie is going to be hard to understand. That's because, as the title implies, it's set in East End London, and… Continue reading Drunk Movie Monday – Cockneys vs. Zombies